


The Tales of a Loved Ninja

by supremeleaderben



Category: Naruto
Genre: Anbu Hatake Kakashi, Attack on the Leaf, Character Death, F/M, Fluff, Ichiraku Ramen (Naruto), Jiraiya is a soft boy, Konohagakure | Hidden Leaf Village, Legendary Sannin, Love at First Sight, Mild Smut, pain so much pain, sorry but this will get sad, will I cry writing this - yes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-31
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:48:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26210656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supremeleaderben/pseuds/supremeleaderben
Summary: Jiraiya found solace in you; you found comfort in him.The two of you were inseparable when he wasn't out on missions; spending every moment together to prepare yourselves for the next time he would have to leave.(I like to believe that Jiraiya would have a soft spot for someone he genuinely cares about (i.e. Tsunade), so the relationship in this fic will be quite soft and intimate; very fluff heavy. Jiraiya is a broken person, who goes through quite a bit - reader gets to be there for him through the majority of it.)(For the most part, this fic stays true to cannon timeline/ but there will be a few instances where the timeline is tweaked slightly for story purposes).(This fic takes place before the Attack on the Leaf and will continue through Pain vs Jiraiya)
Relationships: Jiraiya/Reader, Namikaze Minato/Uzumaki Kushina
Comments: 3
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter One

* * *

  


The warm sun beamed on to your skin as you walked down the path to Icharuku. You couldn’t help but emptily smile at each person you came by; waving and speaking to most as they passed by.

Minato didn’t allow you much time for lunch, so grabbing ramen to go was the most reasonable way to go – plus you had a phone call to make before lunch was over.

“(y/n) Sensei.” You felt a hand tap the back of your shoulder. Swiftly turning around, you looked down to see Kakashi. Every time you saw him you couldn’t help but feel proud; you had watched him grow into an incredible shinobi – and though against your wishes, he made a great ANBU member as well.

“Hey, Kashi!” You patted the top of his head - watching the small amount of cheek above his mask turn red.

“Can I eat ramen with you today?” He reached up to the counter grabbing his to-go bowl of ramen, and then swiftly turned back to you.

You heard your name called as well so you quickly grabbed your container, looking over at the clock to see how much longer you had on lunch.

Fifteen minutes. It took at least five minutes to walk back to the academy which then only gave you ten minutes on the phone; if he answers.

“Sensei?” Kakashi was waving his hands in front of your face, you finally snapped back to reality and smiled at him, “So?” he questioned.

“You know I have to make a phone call; you can hang out in my classroom while I make that call if you would like.” You turned around and started the trek back to the academy, you could hear Kakashi’s feet trek quietly behind you.

“He isn’t worth your worry.” You kept your eyes forward – this wasn’t the first time he’s tried to start an argument over him.

“Kashi, don’t you think it’s wildly inappropriate for you to meddle into my personal life?” Sadly, you knew the answer to this – he cared about you as if the two of you were family.

“Don’t you think it’s wildly inappropriate to be throwing yourself at someone who is nearly double your age.” His voice was annoyed; making fun of you with each word that came out of his mouth.

Was it wildly inappropriate? You didn’t think so. Sure there was a large age difference, but meeting Jiraiya was one of the best things that had happened to you.

“How has ANBU been?” You switched the subject, knowing that there was no winning the conversation about Jiriaya “Are you still having nightmares?”

“Shh,” He hushed you; you could hear the embarrassment in his voice. “ANBU has been fine; yes, the nightmares still happen.” His voice was defeated. He sounded as though he was an old man who had lost everything, instead he was just fifteen and had lost everything.

“Kashi,” you turned around meeting his glance, you could tell he was uncomfortable. “I can talk to Minato about letting you out. You have to take care of yourself too.”

He shook his head, “I’m fine (y/n) Sensei.”

“You haven’t been acting fine.” You turned back towards the academy, “Guy came and spoke to me the other day – Kashi, he’s worried about you. He says you’re reading books about honorable death, that you won’t speak to any of them, and that you just aren’t acting like yourself.”

You had been worried about him for a few years now, but he never let you talk to him about his problems. He always acted like everything was fine; but you could see the subtle differences: the bags under his eyes, the way he would throw himself in front of danger regardless of circumstances, you’ve caught him crying to himself several times. He didn’t tell you about the nightmares until you went to check on him one day and walked in on him washing his hands and sobbing over the sink; saying Rin’s name repeatedly, staring at his hands as if he was witnessing that moment happening on repeat. After that, Kakashi opened up to you a bit – and you checked on him more often, buying him groceries and occasionally bringing him dinner to ensure he was eating.

When Minato told you he was going to suggest ANBU to Kakashi you begged Minato to listen to your concerns, but as his Sensei he thought what he was doing was the best way for Kakashi to deal with the death of his teammates. The following months after he joined you watched him break down further and further; he is a mere shell of the person he was just a few years prior.

“I could be doing better.” Kakashi’s words shocked you, but you kept your eyes forward knowing that looking back at him would likely embarrass him. “I just, I can’t shake it (y/n) Sensei. Every time I close my eyes I see Rin’s face looking back at me in shock? Anger? I could never understand the emotion she gave me and it haunts me in every passing moment. I deserve it though, I killed her. I couldn’t keep my promise to Obito – I couldn’t keep her safe.”

Everything in you wanted you to turn around and hug him; to hold him and tell him that everything was going to be okay. “Kashi, it wasn’t your fault. No one blames you for that incident. Not even Obito would see it as your fault.”

You could hear him start to sniffle, but you were certain he was holding back tears – regardless of how broken he was, he was still one of the strongest shinobi you had been around

“I, I know.” He stumbled over his words, letting out a large exhale once he finished speaking.

You opened the door into the academy, letting Kakashi walk in front of you.

As soon as he got in front of you, you placed your hand atop his head, rustling his hair.

“You can always talk to me; my door is always open – you know that.” You patted his head as the two of you began to ascend the stairs. “And if you don’t want to talk to that’s fine as well – but just know you aren’t alone, okay?”

Kakashi stopped outside of your door, turning around to meet your eyes; through his mask, you could see a small smile coming across his face. “Thank you (y/n) Sensei.”

“Mhm.” You nodded, unlocking the door so he could immediately run in to sit on the beanbag beside your desk.

Looking over at the clock you realized that you only had about five minutes left of lunch to call Jiriaya and eat. You couldn’t help but look over at Kakashi and wonder if he would be okay for those five minutes. Even though he gave you a hard time, you knew he enjoyed seeing you happy. He was like a younger brother to you, and he looked to you as an older sister.

“Do you mind?” You pointed towards your closet; which is where the phone was kept, “He hasn’t answered in the last few days – so I at least want to attempt to check on him.” You gave him a slight smile – waiting for him to inevitably roll his eyes at you.

“Go ahead.” And as you started walking towards the closet you watched him roll his eyes at you just slightly; you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.

The closet was small but you had found comfort in its existence when you started to call Jiraiya during lunch. He would forever be considered a Legendary Sannin of the Leaf, but he was rarely ever in the village itself. Most people speculated what he was up to; but you knew the truth – that he was constantly watching and keeping track of Orichumaru’s movements and writing. He also tended to drink a bit too much when he was out, but you couldn’t blame him considering all he puts on himself.

You grabbed the phone and began dialing the only number you had memorized. Placing the phone up to your ear, you took a deep breath in – fully expecting him to not answer once again. And though you knew he was safe, it was hard not to worry about him when you never got to see him.

You listened to the phone ring. Once, twice, three times; you were almost certain that he was probably once again too busy to answer. Then you heard the click of the phone.

“Jiraiya?” You questioned.

“Hey (y/n).” You immediately felt a smile come across your face; you hadn’t heard his voice in several weeks – you only told Kakashi a few days so that he wouldn’t worry for you.

“Where are you? Are you okay??” You couldn’t help but immediately overload him with questions. The feeling of tears beginning to form in the corners of your eyes made you immediately wipe them away, knowing if Kakashi heard you crying he would only think the worse.

“I’m fine, but hmmm where am I? That’s a good question, isn’t it? Want to take a guess?” His tone was playful; oh how you had missed his voice.

“Are you in the Sand village?” You knew you had no option but to play the game with him or he wouldn’t tell you.

“Think closer.” His voice was giddier this time.

Closer? “Are you in the Land of Fire?” You didn’t want to be hopeful, but you couldn’t help but hope that he would be swinging through for a visit.

“I’m in the office.”

“The office?” Your mind began to run at max speed. Did he mean the Hokage office?

“Mhm, the office.” You could hear him let out a light chuckle.

Without thinking you immediately hung up the phone, nearly dropping it from excitement. As you opened the door, Kakashi’s eyes immediately turned to you; curiosity filling his eyes.

“He’s back?” He questioned as you placed your ramen on the desk.

Turning to answer him, you couldn’t help but let a huge smile spread across your face. “Yes, he’s with Minato.”

“And you’re going? Isn’t lunch almost over?” he went back to eating his ramen; he knew your answer before he even asked it.

“I don’t have a class after lunch and I’ll be back before the next class; you can hang out in here if you want.” You started to turn towards the door but stopped yourself, “Will you be okay? I can stay if I need to?” You loved Jiraiya and had no idea how long he would be in the village, but Kakashi needed someone to be there for him and you couldn’t take that away from him.

You immediately felt your heart warm as you watched a smile spread across his face, his eyes never leaving his bowl of ramen. “I wouldn’t stop you from seeing him; even if I don’t like him. But if you aren’t back by the time your class gets here I’m going to make them go to the training grounds.”

“Okay Kashi, you can torture my students if I’m not back in time.” You let out a laugh as you started to make your way out the door. “You’re sure you’re okay?” you couldn’t help but question him again.

“You better get going before I change my mind.” He threw his hand in the air, gesturing for you to leave.

As soon as you stepped out of the classroom, your pace quickened tremendously. You couldn’t help but nearly run out of the academy.

It had been nearly a year since Jiraiya had been in the village; and you had only been talking to him for a few weeks at that point. You had met him at a bar after the Chunin exams; he hit on you instantly. But you weren’t interested – at least not interested in what he was interested in. Both of you drank quite a few drinks, and he attempted to invite you back to his place but you couldn’t help but laugh in his face. You’ll never forget his face when you did that; he looked shocked as if he had never been turned down in his life. Before leaving the bar you gave him your phone number and told him to call you the next morning if he was still interested. To your surprise, he called you shortly after you woke up the next morning. The most shocking part was that the phone call wasn’t awkward – it felt as though you were talking to a friend you had had your entire life. You both laughed and told jokes, he talked about Orichumaru and you talked about the death of your parents; it was like talking to someone who understood everything even if they hadn’t been through it. He listened when you talked, and you hadn’t had someone listen to you in what had felt like years. The two of you stayed talking on the phone for hours, it was dark outside before the two of you decided it was time to hang up but before that Jiraiya initiated setting up a date to Icharuku.

You couldn’t help but feel your smile growing bigger with each passing step towards the Hokage building.

You had never been to Icharuku before Jiraiya took you; ramen just wasn’t something you ever thought about when looking for restaurants to eat at – plus your parents weren’t the biggest ramen fans so it wasn’t something you were used to eating.

As soon as you got to Icharuku, Jiraiya was waiting outside the curtain for you. As soon as his eyes met yours, his face filled with a smile. The two of you went in and ordered ramen; you let him pick out what you were going to eat since you had no clue what to order – and it did not disappoint. The two of you drank and ate ramen as you talked just as you did the day prior on the phone; this time with more emotion. The booth filled with the noise of the two of you laughing for hours. He walked you home that night; he never tried to do anything funny – he stopped outside your apartment door and kissed the top of your head. As soon as you unlocked your door he began to descend back down the stairwell.

You opened the door and began to sprint up the stairs to get to the Hokage office. Several visitors gave you awkward glances as you passed by them with a huge smile spread across your face.

There were two ANBU members stationed outside of the office, but they didn’t even give you a second glance as you walked up to the door. Without much thought, you pushed the doors open without even knocking. As soon as the doors creaked open, your eyes met Jiraiya’s and you couldn’t help but move quickly. You could feel Minato watching you, but not an ounce of you cared. You opened your arms and threw yourself around him as soon as he got in touching distance.

In a blur, the two of you fell backward onto the ground – Jiraiya immediately holding you tightly to ensure you wouldn’t get hurt.

You both busted out laughing; you could even hear Minato let out a chuckle.

“I’m sorry.” You said softly as you pushed your head deep into his shoulders; his arms pulling you tightly against him.

“You know, Minato and I could’ve been talking about information that you didn’t need to hear.” You could hear the teasing tone in his voice.

You pushed yourself up so that you could look at him, his hand immediately moving up to your face to push the hair away from your eyes. “Oh shit, I’m sorry.” You hadn’t thought much when coming in, your only thought was seeing Jiraiya.

“You know you’re kind of cute when you miss me.” His arms wrapped around you again, pulling you tight against him once again.

Before he left, the two of you held each other for hours in bed; talking about how you were going to stay in contact, you listened to his worries for the missions he was out to complete, he listened to your worries about him going out on missions by himself. Though the two of you mostly just stayed silent – enjoying each other’s presence while you could. When you dozed off in his arms, you woke up to him having already left. A note rested upon the pillow where his head was laid up hours prior.  
You could feel the tears well up against your eyes; you hadn’t realized how much you had needed this hug.

“Jiraiya.” Minato’s soft voice echoed through the room.

Jiraiya laughed as he picked you up off of him; placing you back on to the ground as he stood up to address Minato.

“Sorry Minato.” Jiraiya smiled at him. “Am I good to leave?”

You began to stand up and Minato laughed, “Get out of here you two; what has it been a little over a year?” you shook your head. “Go.” He gestured towards the door and Jiraiya immediately grabbed your hand in his, nearly tugging you behind him.

“You’re still coming over later though, right? I’ve already told Kushina the two of you would be there for dinner.” You looked back at Minato who was smiling ear-to-ear at the two of you.

“We will be there.” Jiraiya never turned around, instead he kept tugging you forward out the door; Minato waved at you as made your way through the door.

You managed to find your pace in his, and instead of being tugged behind him, you were happily walking in stride with him. His large hand completely wrapped around yours; his thumb rubbing small circles on the back of your hand as the two of you walked down the stairs.

“I missed hearing your voice.” As you made your way to the bottom of the stairs he wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you in towards him. The people around you watched the two of you; it wasn’t as if people didn’t know who Jiraiya was – he was a hero of the village, and people knew who you were because you were a teacher at the academy; most though weren’t aware of your relationship.

You could feel the judgment through most people’s eyes; it was to be expected. Jiraiya had himself sold around the village as a pervert and you were sure most people were likely imagining that you were just his next prey. But honestly, he had never made those types of advances towards you – you set up boundaries and he respected them. He would occasionally make a dirty joke, but it was nothing more than a way to make you laugh.

“You were the one who wasn’t answering the phone.” You gripped his hand tighter. Those few weeks without hearing from him were rough; you could only imagine the terrible things that could’ve possibly happened to him – but you kept your hopes up, thinking if something had happened to him that the village would eventually find out.

He pulled your hand into the air, spinning you in a circle and pulling you into a hug. “I’m sorry.” His hands moved from yours and he placed them gently against your face, pulling you towards him.  
You could feel your heart rate accelerate as he guided your face to his; his lips opened slightly and you couldn’t help but smile as your lips crashed onto his.

Before he left you hadn’t even kissed him yet; your relationship wasn’t much of a physical one. He was used to one-night stands and he didn’t want your relationship to be the same as the others.

His cologne lingered on you; the smell of oak and musk; as he slowly released his hands from your face, letting his lips fall off of yours. As you met his eyes you could see a smile spread across his face.

“I’ve wanted to do that for quite some time now.” He pulled you back under his arm, your face turning red with embarrassment as you notice the several onlookers the two of you had.

“How long are you here for?” You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him; the rush of euphoria that you experienced from your lips meeting his vanished and was replaced with panic – this could be his only day in the village.

“I’m back for a while.” He looks over at you, wiping the singular tear that you weren’t able to keep held in, “Minato needs me here for some things, so don’t worry about me leaving quite yet.”

The two of you continued walking hand-in-hand until you got to the riverfront. Jiraiya took his time stretching and then sat beside you on the grass; watching the currents in the water.

“I can’t stay out here for long, I have to get back to my class- “

He cut you off before you were even able to finish your thought, “Don’t worry about your class – Minato got it covered for you.” He laid back onto the grass, stretching his arms behind you and staring up at the clouds moving through the sky.

“Sorry again for interrupting in the office earlier; I just, I wasn’t thinking.” You shook your head in frustration at yourself when you heard Jiraiya chuckle behind you. His large hands wrapping around your waist and pulling you down to lie beside him.

“(y/n), Minato knew as soon as I answered your phone call that our conversation was over; really, he knew as soon as your lunch break started that our conversation was as good as over.” You couldn’t help but laugh with him.

“Wait,” it finally hit you that Minato knew of your relationship – “did you tell Minato?”

Jiraiya cocked his head slightly to look at you, his face calm. “Well, I knew you would be calling me; and considering I was there on official orders I felt it was best to let him know. I wouldn’t worry about him though, he’s just happy to see me happy.” His hand found yours, his fingers interlacing with yours. “Should it be a secret that we are together?” he seemed to be slightly upset at the idea of this.

“I, I just haven’t told anyone.” You pondered this thought for a moment, “Well, expect for Kakashi.”

“White Fang’s kid?” Jiraiya perched himself up a bit; curiosity was written across his face.

“Mhm,” You smiled as you let your gaze leave him and you returned to looking at the clouds. “I’ve watched over him since he died; he’s like a brother to me. He eats in my classroom nearly every day so he’s known since the beginning.” Laughing, you couldn’t help but continue, “He doesn’t like you much though, especially with your reputation.” Jiraiya knew you were only joking; though he did have quite a reputation in the village.

“Ahh, I see.” You could hear him lie back on the grass, “How is he after the incident with Rin?”

You were taken aback by this question. He was rarely in the village, and though that incident was quite horrific you didn’t imagine that he had heard about it. “He, uh –” You tried to think of a way to answer this question without completely disrespecting Kakashi, “He’s as good as you could be after losing one teammate and accidentally killing the other.”

“So, not too good?”

“No, not so great at all.” You pondered if you should drop the conversation, but you had at least one more thing you wanted to bring up, “Minato put him in ANBU after Rin.”

“Yeah, I recall him telling me about that.” You could tell by the tone of his voice that he must have also disagreed with that decision.

“It’s made him worse; they call him ‘Cold-Blooded Kakashi,’ he won’t talk to anyone, well except me – but I have to force it out of him most of the time. But, he won’t leave ANBU.” You could only hope that Kakashi was okay; you had left him in your classroom – but hopefully, he had left and gone on home. Maybe Kushina would have leftovers you could take him.

“I can’t do anything about what Minato does, even if I was his Sensei, he won’t listen to me – especially when it comes to his team. He’s gone through the same losses as Kakashi; he didn’t take any of those events easily. I’m sure he imagines himself in Kakashi’s position, and for him maybe ANBU sounded like the best healing mechanism.” He paused for a moment, “I’m sorry I can’t help him (y/n).”

You shook your head, “It’s fine; I didn’t expect you to able to, but I had to at least try.” His hand tightened around yours.

“I could talk to him though; I won’t tell him I know anything – “  
You cut him off before he could even go any further with that thought, “No, you can’t do that. He would immediately know I told you something. He’s incredibly smart; I would go as far as to say that he’s the best shinobi the Leaf has ever had.”

That piqued his interest, he sat up beside you, watching your face. “The best shinobi of the Leaf, huh?”

“Maybe I’m biased, but I’m almost certain Minato would agree.”

Jiraiya laughed, shaking his head in agreement. “I would say I know for certain he agrees.”

The two of you stay by the riverfront for hours; talking about the past year as if you hadn’t talked on the phone for a good majority of it. He told you that he finished his book; Tales of a Gutsy Ninja. He didn’t have a copy on him, but he promised he would give one to you. You told him about your class this year. You had told him about Shisui Uchiha; the most promising student you had. He was years above his class; he would likely be allowed to graduate early if he kept at the pace he was going. You both couldn’t help but get lost in conversation with each other. He continued, telling you about what it was like training Minato, he brought up the three kids he taught from Amegakure; Konan, Nagato, and Yahiko. He talked about them frequently, even during your phone calls. He couldn’t help but wonder what they were doing and if they were still alive; surviving the war-stricken land. Jiraiya talked about them as if they were his children; it made you upset that he wouldn’t go visit them.

“When need to get going,” he stood up beside you, offering his hand to aid in helping you up. He lifted you from the ground with ease. “Kushina will get upset if we are late.” He patted down his legs to remove the dirt that was spread across them; you did the same to yourself.

“Are you sure it’s okay if I go?” you reached out for his hand; you didn’t want to be a burden on Minato and Kushina.

“Trust me (y/n), if you didn’t show up Kushina would not be pleasant to deal with – plus, she’s excited to have another woman to share the evening with since it’s normally just myself.” He grabbed onto your hand.

You shook your head, still nervous at the idea.

The two of you walked as the sky began to turn orange and the sun began to make its descent for the evening. The air was brisk, but Jiraiya kept his arm wrapped around your shoulders; laughing and making jokes through the entire walk.

As you arrived at the walk path to their door, you could feel your heart rate quicken; but as if he could tell, he wrapped his hand tightly around yours, squeezing it with comfort.

This was the first time the two of you were going out as a couple – at least a known couple; your first outing had to of course be at the Hokage’s residence.

“It’ll be fun.” Jiraiya pulled you along with him, stopping at the door, he turned to you and kissed the top of your head. 

His knuckles hit the door with several loud strikes and you could hear Kushina yell at Minato to go answer the door; within seconds you could hear the door being unlocked. Minato immediately glanced over at you, as if to ensure that you had indeed come with Jiraiya; a smile spread across his face.

“Hi!” he opened the door up for the door of you, “Come on in!” he exclaimed.

You took a deep breath; hand still wrapped tightly in Jiraiya’s. The two of you followed in-behind Minato, who seemed happier than normal – which was saying something considering how bubbly his personality was.

As soon as you made it into their living area, you could hear Kushina moving around in the kitchen.

“I’ll be there in a moment!” She exclaimed as you heard the sounds of dishes being tossed about.

Jiraiya had let go of your hand to walk over to Minato; the two of them deep in conversation. Both of them with smiles spread across their faces; Minato occasionally blushing. You could only begin to imagine the things that Jiraiya could be saying to him.

“Oh!” you looked up to see Jiraiya staring at the doorway; your eyes naturally following his.

“Oh!” You couldn’t help but let out a sound a surprise.

Kushina was standing in the doorway; her belly round with child and her face bright with joy.


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **There is a small part of this chapter that is in reference to episode 128 of Shippuden.
> 
> I hope you all are having a great day :)

* * *

  


“Minato!” Jiraiya pulled him into a hug; you could see the smile spread deeply across his face.

Minato and Kushina had been inseparable for years; it came to no surprise of the village when they finally got married. You were surprised that the village wasn’t in complete celebration of Kushina’s pregnancy, but you hadn’t heard a single person talk about it – not even Kakashi had said anything to you.

“Congratulations.” You smiled at Kushina; you couldn’t help but feel slightly awkward being here considering how significant this news was – and it wasn’t like you were close with Minato or Kushina, you were just a teacher who happened to be dating the Fourth Hokage’s sensei.

Jiraiya moved from the bear hug he was giving Minato and ran over to Kushina – placing his hands delicately on her plump stomach. You could see the slight glisten in his eyes as he spoke quietly to her; you could only imagine the advice he was giving her.

Minato walked over to you, “I’m sorry – this is probably a bit awkward for you.” He laughed and moved his hands behind his head, stretching. “I, however, do have to ask a favor of you.”

You migrated your attention away from Kushina and Jiraiya and turned to Minato, “Of course, Lord Fourth – what do you need?”

His face brightened up, “You can call me Minato here (y/n), no need to be so formal.” He gave you a smile before continuing, “We can’t let the village find out about Kushina’s pregnancy so I must ask you that you keep this news between the four of us.”

You nodded your head in agreement, “Of course, Minato. I can do that.” You couldn’t help but be curious as to why it was to be kept a secret, but you assumed if you needed to know that you would be told.

Kushina’s laughter filled the room as Jiraiya turned away from her and walked towards the two of you. Minato gave you a slight nod of contentment and walked back over to Kushina, placing his arm gently around her back and whispering something into her ear.

“Isn’t this great?” Jiraiya was beaming as he made his way back over to you.

“Mhm, it’ll be fun to have a little Hokage running around the village.” He threw his arms around you, placing you into a big hug; even picking you up slightly off the ground.

“Dinner will be ready in about thirty minutes if you guys want to go ahead and settle at the table.” Kushina smiled at the two of you, beaming with joy, before heading back to the kitchen.

Jiraiya leads the way to the dining room, pulling one of the chairs out to allow you to sit down first. He then took the chair beside you, Minato pulling out a chair across from him.

The atmosphere in the house had changed drastically since you first walked in; the once nervous energy had been completely replaced with the feeling of joy and celebration. You couldn’t help but start smiling; even though you still found it awkward to be one of the very few people in the village to know of her pregnancy – the idea of a small Minato and Kushina running around was exciting. Plus, there was a chance that you would get to teach him once he got old enough to join the academy and you could only imagine that the child would be an incredible shinobi considering his parents.

You looked up at Minato to find him flipping through pages of a book; you tried to look closer at the cover and immediately noticed the author's name.

“Is that Jiraiya’s book?” You looked at Jiraiya smiling, and then back at Minato.

“Yep! Tales of a Gutsy Ninja.” He closed up the book and held it out to you, “Have you read it already?”

You happily took it from him, “No. He said he would get me a copy soon, but I haven’t even been able to see it in person yet.” You couldn’t help but find yourself flipping through the pages.

Jiraiya reached out and snatched it from your grip, immediately you looked up at him and gave him a sour look; you were so happy to finally see what he had been working on and he took it from you.

“I have a special copy for you waiting at my place; I wouldn’t want you to ruin the plot by just flipping through the pages.” He gave you a simple smile as he handed the book back to Minato, who awkwardly took the book back; he mouthed the word “sorry,” to you as he took it from him.

“Anyway, I didn’t feel like it was my best work possible.” Jiraiya looked off in the distance, trying not to make eye contact with you.

“What? No, no. This tale is wonderful!” Minato opened the book back up, “I can’t wait for you to read it (y/n), you’re going to love it.”

“Oh?” Jiraiya sounded shocked to be getting such praise from him.

“Each chapter reads just as you tell all of your numerous stories; it almost feels like an autobiography.”

“Too bad - it isn’t selling at all,” Jiraiya spoke under his breath.

“The main character of this book; his determination to never give up was very cool. He’s a lot like you, sensei.” Minato pulled his gaze from the book and smiled at Jiraiya. You couldn’t help but see his cheeks turn red; you didn’t think he was used to people giving him compliments – at least not about things that he cared deeply about. “So I was thinking, I hope my child can become a ninja just like this main character!” Minato took a pause, placing the book gently on the table, “Which is why I’d like your permission to name my son after him.”

Jiraiya’s eyes widened, you could see them start to gloss over before he quickly wiped his eyes. You couldn’t help but feel a smile spread across your face upon seeing the joy in his eyes.

“I- uh, are you sure? It’s a name I came up with while eating ramen.” Jiraiya seemed taken aback by all of this, he was talking a lot with his hands – motioning the way he ate ramen.

Your eyes immediately found Kushina standing in the doorway, you were certain she could probably hear the conversation from the kitchen.

“Naruto… it’s a wonderful name.” She gave Jiraiya a big smile.

“I guess that would make me his Godfather.” Jiraiya leaned back in his chair, you could tell he was trying to take everything in. “Are you two sure about this?” You placed your hand on his thigh and gave it a light squeeze just to show him that this moment was real; you watched as a smile spread across his face.

“You are my sensei after all! And, you are an incredible ninja who possesses all the traits that I want my son to have. There truly is no other like you.” Minato exclaimed; Kushina walked over and placed her hand on his shoulder.

Silence lingered in the air as Jiraiya took in all that was just said to him; you kept your hand on his thigh, rubbing small circles above his knee.

You knew how much those children from Amegakure meant to him; so you couldn’t begin to imagine the emotion that he was feeling knowing he was going to be a godfather to Minato’s child – that his writing directly influenced the name of the child. He wouldn’t say it out loud, but you knew that that book meant the entire world to him; that he poured his entire soul into that book – so for Minato to tell him that it read as an autobiography and that he wanted his son to be like the main character… you were surprised that he wasn’t crying.

A loud ring from the kitchen broke through the silence as Kushina ran to the kitchen to grab dinner.

Jiraiya reached across the table and grabbed Minato’s hands, “Thank you.”

Minato closed his eyes and smiled, “Of course sensei; this is the least I could do.”

Kushina brought in dinner and it smelled incredible; bowl by bowl she brought in large servings of ramen for each of you. You all sat around the table and talked about life; Jiraiya talked about everything that he had gotten himself into over the past year, you talked about your students, and Minato and Kushina talked about their plans once their son was born. Minato had brought up taking some time off from being Hokage to help for the first few months, Kushina told him it wasn’t necessary – you and Jiraiya though agreed with Minato.

“Did you get your place all tidied up this morning when you arrived?” Minato switched the conversation back to Jiraiya.

“I stopped by to drop off a few things, but I haven’t had the chance to clean up at all.” He laughed, “I don’t even know if the electricity is on, but I’m sure you wouldn’t have my electricity turned off.” He joked.

“It should be on, at least for all I know it is still turned on.” Minato laughed.

“You could stay at my place tonight if you want, and we can go over tomorrow and I can help you tidy your place up?” you spoke without much forethought.

You could hear Minato and Kushina let out a small chuckle; Jiraiya placed his hand on top of your head and rustled your hair. “That sounds good to me.” He smiled at you.

There wasn’t much forethought to what you had said; you hadn’t thought about how that might’ve been a better suggestion for later when the two of you were alone. You knew Jiraiya wasn’t embarrassed, but you couldn’t help be slightly embarrassed at the thought that Minato and Kushina likely thought that the two of you would be enjoying each other in more ways than one later that night. You could feel your cheeks blush with embarrassment.

“So,” Jiraiya spoke up, noticing your embarrassment, “when are you due?”

“October 10th,” Kushina spoke softly, Minato grabbing her hand.

“Ah, so that’s why you wanted me here through September?”

“Nothing better than another pair of eyes, just for security purposes – I’m sure you understand.” Minato paused for a moment, “Plus, there aren’t many other shinobi I trust with this – however,” he shifted his focus to you, “I was thinking of placing Kakashi on security duty of Kushina so, he would be relieved of most of his ANBU duties.”

You felt a rush of relief come over you, “Wait, really?” you had been begging him for months to alleviate some of the stress on Kakashi.

“I’ve been watching him; Guy came to me after he spoke to you – I’m worried about him too (y/n), but I can’t make him quit.”

“I understand; thank you.” You couldn’t help but smile at Minato, Jiraiya looked over at you, grabbing your hand under the table; you knew he understood how much stress you had been under because of him.

“It’s getting late, so we better be leaving so you guys can get some rest.” Jiraiya began to stand up from his chair; holding his hand out to help you get up from yours.

“We could do this weekly while your home Jiraiya if that is of any interest to the two of you?” Minato began to also stand from the table, joining us as we started to walk to the door.

“Thank you for dinner!” You waved back at Kushina as you walked from the dining room. She gave you a slight nod and a wave.

“I know Kushina enjoys having another female around to talk to; so, if you want to join weekly as well I think that would be great!” Minato seemed ecstatic as the two of you were placing your shoes on.

“I think that sounds like a lot of fun.” You said as you slipped your other shoe on.

“Then,” Jiraiya jumped up after placing his shoes one, “same time next week.” Jiraiya pulled Minato into a hug. “Congratulation again.” He spoke softly as he let go of him.

The two of you waved and headed out the door; the brisk night air catching you by surprise. You couldn’t help but look over at Jiraiya as he grabbed your hand, the moonlight catching his white hair just right making the edges look as though they were glowing, the gleam in his eye as you could only imagine he was still thinking of becoming a godfather, and the slight smirk on his face as he noticed you staring.

“So,” he let out a deep laugh, “to your place?”  
You could feel your cheeks redden with embarrassment, nodding your head in agreement. “If that sounds good to you?”

“Of course it does.” He tight on your hand got a bit tighter. “Can you believe they are going to have a child?” he turned his attention back in front of him, his gaze shifting to the moon high in the sky.

“It is pretty exciting.” You moved your gaze to the path in front of you, “I’m sure you’re ecstatic to have a kid in your life you can corrupt.” You joked.

He couldn’t help but let out a gutsy laugh, “You would be correct.” He paused for a moment, rubbing the back of your hand gently as the two off you walked slowly through town. “I’m just so proud of both of them; settling down, Minato becoming Hokage, Kushina still being an incredibly intense woman, and now they are going to get to raise a kid of their own. I just can’t wait to watch them continue to flourish as parents.” You peaked over to see a smile spread across his face. You knew he saw Minato as his own kid; even if he would never tell him that.

“Well, I’m incredibly happy to be able to watch you get to help them with Naruto; I’m sure Minato will ask you to teach him.”

“I’m sure he will.” His voice was in a tone of contentment.

The two of you walked in silence; his hand remained gripped around yours – gently but with some firmness. You could tell that he was still processing everything; his focus not really on you but everything else. It was getting late so there weren’t many people out; the most were some shinobi sitting at Icharuku and enjoying dinner after what you could only imagine was a long day out on missions.

“Oh,” Jiraiya shifted his focus to you, “I was going to ask you something.”

“Huh, what is that?” You were curious what finally snapped him back to reality.

“Kakashi and I will inevitably be working alongside each other these next few months; do you think he’ll take that okay?” he sounded genuinely concerned and you could help but muster out a small laugh.

“Kakashi separates work from his emotions, so I wouldn’t worry much about him. Who knows, he may even grow to like you.” You gave him a smile as the two of you began walking up the stairwell to your apartment.

Your apartment wasn’t the cleanest; you had papers and ungraded tests scattered across both your dining and coffee table – but you could only imagine it was heaps cleaner than what his place was like.

As you unlocked the door, you could feel your heart rate pick up – you hadn’t thought much about the fact that the two of you hadn’t seen each other in over a year, and here he is already spending the night again; you could only hope that he didn’t think it was strange for you to suggest for him to stay the night – you knew he didn’t care, but you couldn’t help but worry about it.

“Ahh,” as soon as he walked through the door he placed his shoes against the wall, stretching his arms behind his head, “I missed this place.”

He turned around and threw his arms around you, easily picking you up off your feet and spinning the two of you in a circle, “But not as much as I missed you.” He held you above him for a moment before he guided you down, his lips intricately interlacing themselves in yours. 

Your brain didn’t have much time to recognize what was happening; as your lips danced along each other’s, your heart rate increased with each passing second. So, this is what love felt like; giddy by the simplest of touches.

He kept you lifted in the air; your feet dangling gracefully just off the ground as you pushed your hands through his thick-long hair; your lips continuing to parade along one another – his hot breath escaping delicately onto your lips, causing chills to run down your spine.

The pace of his lips slowed down and he lifted you up and away from his face; his face blushed red as he looked at you. He pulled you down and gave you a quick peck on the lips before placing you back onto the ground; stumbling, you had to take a moment to find your balance.

“Sorry about that,” He laughed and threw his arms behind his head, “I’ve just been thinking of doing that nearly every day for a year now.” He gave you a smile before heading towards your kitchen.

“Do you want me to grab you a drink?” his voice carried throughout your small apartment, but you were walking right behind him.

“I can get it myself,” you smile, opening the cabinet and grabbing two glasses.

Jiraiya placed his hand on the fridge door before pausing for a moment, his eyes reading something that you had placed there.

“You kept this?” he pointed to the paper on the fridge, turning to you with a smile on his face.

“Oh,” you paused for a moment, placing the glasses on the counter, “mhm.”

It was the note that he had left on his pillow before leaving out; you read it nearly every day for two weeks before deciding that you would just place it on the fridge so you could read it easily in the morning. Him detailing his emotions for you; describing the way you looked so beautiful sleeping next to him, the way that he couldn’t stop thinking about you ever since the two of you first met, but more specifically how he would think about you and miss you every day until he was able to come back to the village. It read like a novel; which is why you knew that his novel was going to be incredible.

He opened the fridge up and pulled out the pitcher of water, walking over to you and pouring the water into the two glasses beside you.

“I meant every word of what I wrote; however, I can’t wait to see how beautiful you are when you’re asleep beside me once again.” He gave you a sly smirk as he pulled the glass up to his lips.

You couldn’t help but feel your cheeks blush once more; this was becoming a common occurrence around him – and you could tell by the sly smirk spread across his face that making you blush had become a game to him.

The two of you stood in silence as you both finished your glasses of water; he placed the pitcher back into the fridge before walking back over to you grabbing the glasses and placing them into the sink.

“Are you ready for bed?” he cocked his head over, grinning.

“Sounds good to me” You smiled at him, turning the kitchen lights off as the two of you headed toward the bedroom.

He placed his hands on your waist as the two of you trotted into the bedroom; his hand rubbing your waist gently. He let go of you as you skipped over and jumped into the bed; pulling back the blanket for him to join you – patting the pillow that he laid on all those months ago.

“Ahhhh,” he threw himself back onto the bed, his head immediately cocking to the side to look at you, “yep, just as beautiful as I remember.”

You pulled the blanket over your face so that he wouldn’t get the validation of seeing you blush; you knew that he knew you were blushing though because when you rolled over to look at him you could see that patented smirk spread across his face.

“I can’t wait to meet little Naruto,” Jiraiya turned his head back, his gaze facing the ceiling, “I can only hope he’s as strong-willed as both Minato and Kushina.”

You grabbed his hand, placing it atop his chest, “He’s going to be so lucky to have you.”

“He’ll be lucky to have you in his life too; you know? You aren’t going anywhere.” He rolled over on his side; his hands moving up to gently caress your face. “I know I’ve said this a few times already, but – I missed you.” His thumb carefully rubbed across your cheek.

You were still settling into the fact that he just told you that you weren’t going anywhere; you were going to be a part of Naruto’s life as well. The caress of your face in his hands made you nuzzle deeper in his hold, “I missed you too.” You spoke softly, closing your eyes as he continued to rub your face gently.

“Do you want me to wake you in the morning so we can head to my place, or should I let you sleep in and we can just head over later that afternoon?” he spoke quietly, noticing that you hadn’t reopened your eyes.

“You can wake me.” You murmured out; you felt the softness of his lips graze your forehead as he pulled you into his embrace.

You fell asleep quite quickly in the arms of the one person who made you feel warmth and love pulsating through your veins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Minato and Kushina soooo much it hurts; I can't wait to write a bit more of them in the upcoming chapters.


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Trigger Warning* There is a brief mention of suicide towards the end of the chapter/nothing explicit - just talking about Sakumo! and then some of Kakashi's inner-demons.
> 
> Sorry this took so long to get posted! And also sorry about this chapter being so long! 
> 
> I still don't know how I feel about this chapter; I've felt pretty meh about it - but there are aspects of it that I really enjoy so I hope you guys do too!
> 
> (Also I have a Naruto discord server if anyone wants to come hang out think link will be in the chapter notes at the end).

* * *

  


You awoke to a soft pair of lips lingering on your forehead; your name being whispered gently from them;

“(y/n) it’s time to wake up.” His lip touched your forehead once more, lingering until your eyes opened – greeted by the sunlight peering through the window blinds.

Jiraiya shifted himself so he could look at you; a smile spreading across his face. You had to blink a few times to make sure you weren’t imagining him being there. It had been so long since the two of you had spent the night together that seeing him felt surreal to you, especially on a still tired brain.

“Hi.” You stared at him; your cheeks warming with blush as he watched you carefully as you stretched and rubbed your eyes awake.

“I made breakfast with some of the stuff you had in your fridge.” He rustled your hair with his hand, “I figured you would want to eat before we went to clean my place.” He stood up and held his hand out; you took it and he instantly pulled you to your feet.

As you followed in behind him you noticed the plate of toast and eggs sitting at the table as well as a hot glass of tea waiting for you to drink it.

“Thank you.” You flashed him a smile as you sat down, immediately grabbing the tea in hopes it would wake you. As you tossed it back the warmth coated your throat and you could fill it begin to warm the rest of your body. As you placed the cup back onto the table, you yawned once more before snatching a piece of toast.

“So,” you placed the toast back onto your plate, taking another drink of tea before continuing, “exactly how much of a mess should I expect your place to be?” You pulled the glass back to your mouth as your gaze met his; a smirk immediately appearing.

“Uh,” he laughed, “it’s not that bad; dusty – but not too dirty. But, I do have your copy of my book waiting for you there.” He immediately went back to sipping his tea.

“Ah.” you placed the cup down, “So, you just want to go over to get that?”

He nodded his head; his face turning slightly red; you imagined it was because of how self-conscious he was about his writing, but – he knew he had no choice but to let you read it since it’s the majority of what he talked about for a year on the phone.

Once you finished up eating, Jiraiya took the dishes and gave them a quick wash as you got ready. You had a moment of panic thinking you had forgot about your class but when you went to the calendar you realized it was thankfully a weekend; so, you returned to getting ready to head over to Jiraiya’s.

You threw on your blue t-shirt and then just tossed a pair of matching sweats on before going out to find Jiraiya waiting patiently by the door; he gave you a gentle look up and down before walking over to you and throwing his arms around you.

“You look good.” He kissed the top of your head.

Part of you couldn’t help but laugh at his compliment – it’s not like you had particularly tried to look good this morning.

“You too.” You smiled at him and leaned up on your toes; puckering your lips until you found his. Pressing eagerly into him; you wanted him to feel every last kiss that you had longed to give him over the past year.

His large hand gently pressed against your forehead, pulling your lips apart. “Hmmph?” you let out, eyes peering up at his - curious as to why he separated the two of you.

“You’ve got to stop before I decide to make some abrupt changes to our plans.” He kept his palm on your forehead, his face turning a deep red.

“What kind of changes are those?” You knew exactly what you were doing to him; you continued to tease him – your fingers tracing their way along his collar.

“(y/n).” His voice was lower but his palm never wavered – even if his eyes were telling you a different story.

“I just asked a simple question.” You continued tracing your fingers along his collar, slowly caressing his jawline, “And yet, you haven’t answered me.” You couldn’t help but smirk at him.

Twelve months was a long time. Twelve months was enough to drive both of you crazy; and you knew that – you and Jiraiya frequently brought it up during conversations. You both longed to be touched, to be kissed, to be loved by one another. And now you were gifted with several months to do all of those things and you didn’t think you could bring yourself to ever want to stop.

“(y/n).” His thumb began to brush your hair away from your face, “You’re playing a dangerous game.” _Bingo_. You looked up at him to find his eyes filled with hunger, the pressure against your forehead slowly beginning to ease up. You were going to win this “ _dangerous game._ ”

“Oh,” you let out a small laugh, pushing against his palm to get closer to him again, “A _dangerous game_? Do tell me more.” You pressed a small kiss against his neck, letting your breath graze his skin. Jiraiya instantly becoming unstable at the knees.

Jiraiya throws his arms under yours and picks you up, you immediately toss your arms around his neck and wrap your legs around his waist. His lips came crashing down onto your neck – hot, breathy, but delicate kisses. His hands are gripped tightly around your ass, pulling you up towards him with ease whenever he desired.

You found your hands finding his hair; his thick, long, white hair. You were pulling at it – wanting his lips to do nothing more than meet yours. His hands moved up your body, one staying placed on your ass and the other finding its way to your hair as well. He couldn’t help himself but pull it back so he could kiss more of your neck.

Your voice was breathy, “Jira-” you couldn’t finish saying his name before you heard a light knock against your door.

The two of you both exhaled in desperation; his eyes meeting yours – longing for you to just forget about the knock at the door. But, there it went again – a light knock – you knew exactly who it was and you weren’t about to let him walk away.

“I’m sorry.” You mouthed quietly as he placed you back onto the ground, the two of you still trying to find your balance. Jiraiya just nodded back at you. 

As you walked to the door, Jiraiya walked towards the bathroom – you tried evening out your clothes and placing your hair back into the places it needed to be. It was pointless though, you knew he would know something was going on as soon as you opened the door.

You unlocked the top lock and slowly opened the door, “Kashi!” you swing the door open the rest of the way – greeting him with a huge smile and a hug.

Once you released him from your hug, his eyes look you up and down and then behind you into your apartment.

“He’s here, isn’t he?” he didn’t sound upset, at least not in the way you expected – if anything you thought that he sounded intrigued.

“Oh?” you looked behind you, expecting Jiraiya to just be standing in the living room but he wasn’t, “Jiraiya?” you asked, even though you knew there was no one else he could be talking about.  
Kakashi just shook his head.

“Yeah, he’s here.” You smiled at him, “You want to meet him?” you sounded eager – all you wanted was for him to get along with Jiraiya and understand why he meant so much to you.

“Sure.” He was smug, not showing much – if any – emotion. “I do have some news though.” His eyes lit up when he said it, his voice dropping just above a whisper.

“What is it Kashi?” you tried to match his articulation.

“I get to watch over Kushina instead of doing my normal ANBU duties; I know I told you I didn’t want out – but I just wanted to tell you, thank you.” His eyes met yours, and you could tell that he genuinely meant every word he was about to say, “I’m still not okay – but I think this is going in the right direction. But I feel like you must’ve had some pull with Minato to agree to lessen my duties so, thank you.”

You couldn’t help but pull him into another hug, “I had nothing to do with it – but I did know he was going to do that.” You roughed up his hair as you let him go, “Isn’t it exciting?” you let your voice drop even lower, “Minato and Kushina are having a child? A tiny Hokage?” You couldn’t help but beam with excitement; you wanted the excitement to be for Minato and Kushina but you knew that you were just excited to see Jiraiya love this child more than he could be imagining.

Kakashi smiled, “A tiny Lord Fourth does sound like it’ll be a good time.” You knew how much he cared for Minato so you could only imagine that Kakashi was going to view this child as someone he was to always keep safe.

“Am I intruding on anything?” Jiraiya’s booming voice echoed behind you, catching you slightly off-guard. “Oh! Hi,” he paused for a moment, “I’m taking it you’re Kakashi Hatake?” he began to walk over, his hand outstretched to meet Kashi’s – who obliged. “We will be seeing a whole lot more of each other since we will both be watching over Kushina.” Jiraiya smiled but Kakashi didn’t meet him with the same energy.

You knew that Kakashi thought that he was specially picked to protect Kushina – he had not given it any thought that there could be others working with him. Others who could ridicule him and remind him of his past. You could see him shudder in stress; a small detail of his that you had only began to pick up recently.

“It’ll be fine though Kashi,” you smiled at him, “because Jiraiya will be doing more for Minato than anything – the two of you will likely rarely run into each other.”

He just nodded back at you, his body still shaking softly.

“Did you eat?” You weren’t going to let him stand there and stress longer about things out of his control; you were also certain that he likely didn’t take the time out of his morning to fix himself breakfast.

“It’s fine.” His voice was stern, but his gaze was still soft, “I have to get going anyway; Minato wants to fill me in the rest of the way before I switch duties.”

“Wait –” you ran over to the kitchen, opening the fridge and finding a muffin that you had baked earlier in the week. Once you grabbed it you darted back over to see Kashi and Jiraiya making small talk; Jiraiya was laughing and Kashi was just letting him talk.

“Here you go.” You held the muffin out for him, “I made these earlier in the week; I know they aren’t your favorite but you can at least eat something.” You watched as he grabbed the muffin from your hand, giving you slight smile.

“Fine,” He began to unwrap the muffin, turning around, “I have to go.” he gave you a small wave, “It was nice meeting you.”

Before Jiraiya could even say anything back Kakashi was long gone. You shut the door and turned back around to see him laughing to himself. His face was soft; the lines around his mouth caressing his lips, his eyes gentle– barely opened, his hair still messed up from your hands. It took everything in you to not get lost in acknowledging every inch of him.

“We should get going.” His lips were pulled back into a smile, his eyes still soft but now the gaze was fixated on you.

You couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed that he wasn’t begging to continue your earlier shenanigans. “Fine.” You spoke softly as you walked over to put your shoes on; you were certain that he could see you pouting quietly to yourself.

The two of you walked quietly to his place; hands intertwined with one another. You found yourself rubbing the various scars and callouses on his hands; he found himself tracing his thumb along the side of your hand. You would catch him looking at you; you had never been looked at the way he did. His eyes would light up every time he could catch a glimpse of you, even if it was just for a second. You couldn’t help but look at him in a similar fashion; you never wanted to see him leave the village.

His hand slowly released from yours as he reached into his pocket; the sound of a loose object rattling around his fingertips becoming prominent. He pulled out a set of keys, and his hand immediately found yours once more. His other hand fumbled with his keys, trying to figure out which key matches the door.

You laughed as you pulled your hand from his; allowing him to use both hands to open the door. As he pushed the key in and turned the knob the dust in the air began to sparkle in the sunlight.

“Ahhh,” he pushed the rest of the way, “home sweet home.” He immediately tossed his keys onto the hall table, no regard to the thick layer of dust he had stirred up by doing so.

He walked towards the light switch, turning it on and showcasing the state of his place. It wasn’t dirty; you were certain that you helped him clean up before he left – but the dust was laid thick on every possible surface area. You immediately took a deep breath in, regardless of the state of the place it still smelled exactly as you remember it. Even though you two only knew each other shortly before he left, you spent a good portion of time at his place. The two of you plopped on his couch, the television left off, and the two of you talking for endless hours. By the last few days you would sit on the opposite end of the couch and throw your feet on his lap; he would rub your feet as the two of you talked about family, friends, and the many losses you had both experienced. You would occasionally bring up the hard fact that neither of you were guaranteed another day; especially with the two of you being shinobi – but Jiraiya would try and change the subject. His face always became distressed; his hands would dig into your feet a bit harder. He didn’t handle loss of any kind, but losing people he cared about was the one thing he feared the most.

“You want me to grab the cleaning supplies?” You tried to shift yourself out of reminiscing on old times; you wouldn’t get the same experiences until everything was clean.

“Do you know where they are?” Jiraiya nodded his head in the direction of a hall closet, “If you want to grab that, I have to go grab something out of my bedroom.” He gave you a quick grin and darted to his bedroom; shutting the door softly behind him.

You couldn’t help but bring yourself to scoff at him as you walked in behind to the closet; opening the door to find only the bare necessities to clean his house, you decided to grab the duster first as that was the biggest issue.

The next fifteen or so minutes you spent just attempting to get all the dust cleaned from the surfaces; every surface reminding you of the few weeks you spent together. You couldn’t help but look over at the bedroom door – curious as to why he still hasn’t come out to help you clean. You couldn’t help but think to yourself that he was just trying to get you to do all the dirty work.

As you swept up the last bit of dust in the room you heard the door crack open; “Took you long enough, I was starting to think –” You peaked around the corner noticing Jiraiya was holding a poorly wrapped gift and immediately your thoughts shifted, “What is that?” you spoked excitedly as you leaned the broom up against the wall.

“I wish you wouldn’t get your hopes up.” He held the small gift low, hoping you wouldn’t notice the wrapping. “It’s nothing too special.” He started walking towards you. 

You could immediately tell that he was nervous to give you whatever was in the wrapping, “I don’t have my hopes up.” You gave him a smile hoping it would ease his nerves, “What’s the occasion?” you laughed as he made his final stride to you, stopping in front of you with the gift held out. 

“No occasion,” he held it out the rest of the way, allowing you to grab it; it wasn’t heavy, but it wasn’t light either. “It isn’t anything special. Just thought I would try my hand at wrapping something for you; especially since I missed your birthday and the holidays this past year.”

A smile immediately spread across your face; it didn’t matter what the gift was, you were just happy to have someone that cared enough to even try. 

You slide your finger under the brown wrapping, trying to ignore the few holes and poor taping so you wouldn’t get a peak. With a glide of the finger, you had ripped through the tape, just leaving you to peel back the paper. You could hear Jiraiya; though he was standing still, the energy he was giving off was as if he was pacing back and forth in the hallway.

With a turn of the hand, you uncovered the wrapping, “Your book!” finally, you had waited for what felt like ages to get your hands on this; to finally know what he had been working on. You were already proud of him – but you knew you were going to be prouder the second your eyes gazed upon his words. 

“See,” he scoffed, “nothing special.” 

“Nothing special.” You laughed, “I’ve only been waiting to read this for a year now.” As you looked up from the book you noticed his face was a light shade of pink. 

Without hesitation you turned to the hall table and placed the book down; as soon as the book hit the table you turned around and wrapped your arms around him. He was still; not moving with your touch. It didn’t bother you, you just squeezed him tighter.

“Uh,” he placed his palm against your forehead once more, “that wasn’t all of the gift.” Peeking at his face, it was now a deeper shade of red.

“What’s the rest?” You stood up straight; looking at him with big eyes. You could only hope he knew that whatever it was, wasn’t worth the stress he was giving himself.

He leaned forward, reaching his arm behind you and grabbing the book once more off the table. As he pulled his hand back, he placed the book back into your palms. “You have to open the book.” His fingers traced across yours, then stopping - resting atop the book. As you peered back at him he had a different gleam in his eyes, one that told you to trust him.  
His hand slid down the book, opening the book to the back cover. His hand held against the page tightly as his eyes shifted to yours.

“Well, what is it?” you teasingly ran your fingers across the back of his hand, his fingers curling around the edges. 

“Promise you won’t laugh?” his voice was a bit teasing. 

You couldn’t help but smile at his change of tone; your hands resting atop his trying to pry them from holding on.

Keeping your eyes on the book, you watched as he pulled his hand back. His picture becoming the first thing you noticed; it was cute – an innocent picture of his travels that you hadn’t seen. Once he removed his hand, he grabbed the bottom of your hand and pushed the book towards you; you understood – he wanted you to read the part under the photo. 

As you pulled the book up to begin reading, Jiraiya walked away and sat onto the couch – occasionally peering over at you as if to check your expression. 

You looked at the words; recognizing them as words from one of his old students – it immediately warmed your heart knowing how much he cared for those kids. As you made it towards the end, you could feel your heart begin to race and a warmth spread over you.

_“To the person I crave to be around, to love, to be loved by; I want to dedicate this book to you. Without your encouragement and daily calls, this would’ve never been completed – nor would it have been published. I can only hope to receive that encouragement for the rest of my life.”_

Warmth; your body felt warm. You felt loved. A few tears finding their way out of your eyes, finding their way down your cheeks – dotting them with dampness. 

“This person,” you pointed at the book and looked over at Jiraiya, who at this point was sitting on the edge of the couch watching you, his head resting in his palms, “is me?” you couldn’t help but point at yourself.

You felt silly even asking that question; if it wasn’t you, he wouldn’t have made such a big deal about giving it to you. 

He gave you a slight nod, “Is that okay?” he threw his arms behind his head; trying to play-off any nerves he may have felt.

“Is that okay?” You could feel the glee in your voice as you gripped the book in your hands, immediately sprinting over to him and crouching down on the floor below him. You looked up at him, his hands immediately caressing your face; thumb tracing along the edge of your face. “Of course that’s okay, Jiraiya. I’m so honored and happy to even have a trace of my existence in your life – let alone a novel that you wrote.”  
You spoke softly as you leaned into his hands. 

“(y/n),” he tilted your head up so that he could see your face, “I love you.”

The tears that threatened to fall before began to fall; though you knew he loved you – he had never said those words to you. You smiled as he brushed away the tears, “I love you too.”

You both sat like that; enjoying each other’s company; enjoying the radiating love coming off one another. _Home_. Jiraiya felt like home to you and you felt like home to Jiraiya. 

After a while, you slowly got up and threw yourself onto the couch beside him – immediately laying your head into his lap. He brushed the hair from your face and placed a kiss atop of your head.

He turned on the television and you immediately opened the book - becoming completely enamored with the words on the page. 

You had an entire year to dream about what his writing would be like, what the story would be like, and how many times you would find yourself going back to read it. There were a few days that you were scared that it wasn’t going to be any good at all, but you were happy to finally know that that fear was very unnecessary. 

As you got further into the book, you began to see the scenes play out. This ninja who refused to go against his word, a ninja that was working tirelessly to do the work that he had sat out to do; you couldn’t help but imagine Jiraiya as the main character considering the story was so similar to the tales that he had told you of the _Third Great Ninja War_. But, instead of Jiraiya, this character’s name was Naruto. 

After some time, you found yourself having nothing but a few pages left – the sun had already begun to get lower in the sky causing a reddish-orange overcast to shine over the living room. Jiraiya’s hand never left your hair; his fingers playing with the various strands. 

“You’re going to finish it?” he spoke softly as to not interrupt your reading.

His voice immediately made you sit up beside him, “Of course I’m going to finish it Jiraiya, it’s so good. The character, his stories, his ambition,” you paused, placing your finger on the page you were on as the book closed around it – leaning forward to get closer to him, “I love it Jiraiya, I really do.”

Your lips immediately found his; his hand immediately sliding up the back of your neck and finding its home in your hair – pushing you closer to him.

Regardless of how much you wanted to continue kissing him, you only had a few pages left and you wanted to finish it – so, you pulled away from him. His expression was sad; he never wanted to stop holding you or kissing you. 

“I’ve just got a few pages left,” you smiled at him as you laid back into his lap; immediately opening the book back to where you left off.

As you read the last few lines of the book, you couldn’t help but feel tremendously proud of both the object you were holding and the person who was allowing you to use them as a pillow. You couldn’t help but read over the back cover once more; your heart already so full of joy could barely handle reading it again.

“How did you like it?” he looked down at you as you shut the book.

“It was one of the best reads I’ve ever had,” you shifted up beside him, “but I have to ask if you built the character’s stories from your own because some of them sounded familiar?” You smiled and cocked your head to the side awaiting an answer.

“Of course I drew from my own stories,” he placed his hand out and rustled your hair, “where else would I get inspiration?” however, the question felt more like a statement to you so you decided to not answer it. You were happy that he wrote parts of his stories; the ones that didn’t feel familiar to you only made you crave getting to know him better so that you could find the similarities. 

“Are we staying at your place tonight?” you placed your back against the couch but leaned over to place your head on his shoulder.

You felt him nod his head, “As long as you don’t mind.”

“I prefer your place to mine,” you laughed, “– plus your bed is more comfortable.”

He laughed as the two of you engrossed yourself with whatever television program was turned on. 

As the two of you tried to figure out what to eat, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a key; “I forgot to give this to you earlier,” he held the key out to you, “but I figured you would need this in case you wanted to come here and I wasn’t home.”

You grabbed the key and immediately pulled your keys out; sliding it onto the ring beside your house key.

“I’m starting to think that your goal today was to make my heart explode with love,” you laughed, “thank you.” You gave him a big smile and he, in-return, wrapped his arms around you – pulling you tightly against him.

* * *

  


The next few months passed in a blur; the two of you would work, eat dinner together, and then cuddle up on his bed and fall asleep. It had become too normal having him in your life every moment; the idea of him leaving was becoming more real by the day and you couldn’t help but feel your heartache every time you thought about it. Regardless of anything else going on, every week the two of you would join Minato and Kushina for dinner. Minato and Jiraiya would talk about behind the scenes antics, while you and Kushina would gush about your partners and talk about Naruto. 

“Do you think Jiraiya is excited to be a godfather?” Kushina spoke lowly; preventing the men from hearing your conversation.

You could feel yourself beaming, “Kushina,” you softly chuckled, “it’s all he talks about. We go out and train together and he always fantasizes what it’ll be like to train him, if we go out to eat he’ll bring up the fact that eventually, we will have a third guest with us, I think Jiraiya is absolutely in love with him and he hasn’t even met him yet.” 

“He’s always loved so unconditionally,” she leaned in closer to you, “I think he would make a great father one day (y/n).”

Immediately you began to choke on your drink; your coughing causing the men to glance over in your direction. Kushina just laughed and gestured them to go back to their conversations. Once you stopped coughing you found yourself laughing, “Oh, no – we aren’t interested in that.” 

She stared at you for a moment, “What do you mean not interested?” her tone was quizzical.

“Well, I have the kids at the academy and Jiraiya has the kids that he has taught; we enjoy having kids in our lives, but we also enjoy our alone time too much to want to give it up. Plus, he’s not promised to be in the village long enough to raise a child.”

“I’m sure Minato could make some adjustments and keep him here –” Her voice was a bit too loud; Minato immediately hearing his name and tuning into the conversation.

“I could do what now?” he spoke teasingly, a smile spread across his face. 

The way the two of them interacted was intoxicating; their love for each other was apparent in each word spoken and each glance they gave one another. You couldn’t help but wonder if you and Jiraiya looked at each other in the same way or interacted in a way that made people roll their eyes because of how _in love_ you were.

“Nothing Minato, just go back to talking about Kakashi and ignore us – “ 

You were immediately shocked to hear Kakashi’s name; you hadn’t been listening to what Minato and Jiraiya were talking about but it did surprise you to know they were talking about Kakashi.

“What’s going on with Kakashi? He seemed happier than usual when I spoke to him yesterday; is everything okay?” You began to panic; though his duties had been reduced tremendously – he still wasn’t himself – he still wouldn’t talk to his friends, and he would still read books that Guy would come to you and complain about; scared for his friend.

“Don’t worry (y/n), Kashi is fine,” Jiraiya spoke softly. He knew how much you cared for him, so he could immediately see the panic rising in your body. “We can talk about it more later.” He gave you a smile that made you believe that everything was okay and you felt the tension in your body ease up.

They both turned back around and began talking in a hushed tone; Jiraiya laughing at whatever Minato was saying. 

“Sorry,” Kushina leaned back towards you, “I forget that you two are basically family.” She rested her hand on your shoulder, “But I wouldn’t worry about him; he’s seemed happier recently. He’s always bringing me a snack or some small gift for Naruto to have at the start of his shift.”

You nodded back at her. Of course, they would tell you not to worry about him, they hadn’t seen the Kakashi that was waking from nightmares and scrubbing his hands raw because he would imagine them being soaked in the blood of his teammates. They hadn’t seen him break down over minuscule tasks simply because he had seen Obito do them; Kakashi was a kid with unbelievable talent that made his trauma and problems get brushed over. 

“Anyway, back to having kids –” Kushina let a smile spread across her face. You knew she could sense you panicking; she had gotten really good at being able to tell what topics made you uncomfortable over the past few months. 

“Kushina, I told you we don’t want any.” You laughed. She may not understand, but it was a topic that you and Jiraiya had talked extensively about – especially after finding out about Kushina’s pregnancy. 

“Fine,” she scoffed teasingly, “I’m sure Naruto will spend more time with you than you want; it’ll be like having your own.” She laughed.

“And I’m sure Jiraiya and I will happily have him over whenever he wants to come; or, if you and Minato just need some alone time.” You looked over at Jiraiya who was whispering something into Minato’s ear – his eyes growing wider with each word. All you could do was roll your eyes imagining the things that would cause him to react in that kind of way.

“I hope you know that Minato already has it written down that you’ll have him in the academy; you’re going to be just as much a part of his life as Jiraiya will be.” She smiled at you. 

You immediately laughed not knowing how else to react, “I don’t know why you guys want me to have him in the academy – “

“Because we know you’ll be able to handle him.” She laughed, “I just have a feeling that he’s going to be a handful and if you’re able to handle Jiraiya – well, I’m sure you’ll be able to handle Naruto.” 

The two of you continued talking about life and how much that was all about to change; she couldn’t help but repeatedly tell you how happy she was that Jiraiya finally found happiness. Her and Minato were always concerned that he would be alone forever; especially with his “reputation.” It wasn’t uncommon knowledge that he was a lonely person who always tried to find short-term happiness in one-night stands, however, it still rattled your brain that it was you that he found solidarity in. 

“We better start going (y/n), the sun is already long gone behind the horizon,” Jiraiya spoke up as he slid the chair away from the table and immediately standing up; Minato standing upright after him. 

You looked back over at Kushina and smiled at her – extending your hand so that you could help her stand from the chair.

“It was nice seeing you two,” Kushina looked over at Jiraiya then back at you; a warm-motherly tone coming over her.

“Same time next week?” Jiraiya continued as he began to walk towards the door; the three of you following in-behind him. 

“Sounds good to us,” Minato rested his hand on your shoulder, “there will only be a few more of these dinners before you leave; (y/n) you’re always welcome to continue coming – especially once Naruto is born.” 

Though you wanted to respond immediately, you felt your breath leave your chest. You keep trying to forget that there were only a few more weeks you had left with Jiraiya, and for it to leave Minato’s mouth made it feel more real. 

Kushina must’ve been able to tell that you were stuck on his words, as she gave his back a firm pat, “Jiraiya, I’m sure you’ll come back shortly after Naruto’s birth?” 

“I plan on coming back after a few months this time; I have no intention of staying gone for over a year - if at all possible, ever again.” He reached forward and grabbed your hand, pulling you towards him.

“Good, we’ll be happy to see you.” Kushina spoke softly as Jiraiya began to open the door; the two of them waving you goodbye as you ventured out into the brisk night air, Minato’s face spread red with embarrassment. 

The two of you walked through town in silence; both of you lost in thought about the time you’ll have to spend apart - lost in the star-dotted sky imagining a life that’ll be so different than it is right now. 

“Kakashi,” Jiraiya gripped your hand tighter, immediately pulling your thoughts back to the present, “he’s quite stubborn isn’t he?” 

You could feel yourself become nervous; you had forgotten that he was going to talk to you about Kashi – about something that you had no inclination of what it could be.

“He is,” you scoff, “why do you ask?”

“He’s starting to talk to me more,” his thumb brushed alongside yours, “but, he’s always so distant as if he thinks that just talking to me will curse me to disappear from this world.”

“He’s afraid to get attached to anyone. You know this; I’ve told you about all the people he has lost – wouldn’t you be scared to get attached too?” You were confused as to why he was bringing this up; this wasn’t new knowledge – this was something that he had battled ever since Sakumo died in front of him.

“I would be,” his gaze shifted to the ground, “but he isn’t afraid to get close to you?” 

“Jiraiya, we’ve known each other since he lost Sakumo – he needed someone, and I had a similar experience to him. Of course he latched onto me; what’s the point?” you were tired of him trying to glaze over whatever the issue was. 

“You need to talk to him; I catch him reading those books about how ninja are supposed to ‘honorably’ die – he’s always slumped over – I’m worried about him and I don’t even know him.” His hand loosened up on yours, “A fifteen-year-old boy shouldn’t be reading books on death.”

“Most teenagers shouldn’t have to go through the things he’s gone through.” You spoke under your breath. “I can talk to him – but you know, he might appreciate it if you spoke to him as well, just so he knows that he has someone else on his side.”

“I can do that,” Jiraiya promised as he unlocked his front door. “ _Friend-Killer Kakashi_. Sakumo would’ve hated that.” He just shook his head at the thought.

Everyone knew why Sakumo killed himself; abandoning a mission to save his friends to then have them turn against him for doing so. He placed his friends' lives above a mission – you couldn’t blame him for that; you had always had major respect for Sakumo for doing what he did.

You and Kakashi would talk about Sakumo occasionally; you would try to tell him that his death was not in vain – that he would’ve wanted him to live a happy life without him. You also tried to convince him that just because that happened to his dad didn’t mean he had to be so harsh in terms of rules and protocols. He never understood you until he lost Obito; after that, he knew that he would throw away an entire mission to save his friends. He came to you in shambles after Obito’s death; none of his words even audible – his new Sharingan shining brightly against his defeated face. Once he finally calmed down enough to talk to you, all he could do was promise that he would never let Rin die – his promise to Obito could never be broken. 

Then Rin died; this was an entirely different broken. He stayed at your house for a week; trembling, not sleeping, screaming, crying, refusing to eat. When he finally let you talk to him he repeatedly told you that he had no purpose left here, that he had failed the biggest promise that he had ever made – more importantly that his promise was in shambles due to his own hands. He yelled at you for hours, telling you that he didn’t want you in his life – that you were destined to die if you cared anything about him, and you just let him – you let him yell at you until there was nothing left to say. You can vividly recall the way he cried into your arms after that; you held him into the night, promising him that you weren’t going anywhere – reminding him that he still had Minato and you, and would for a really long time. 

You hadn’t heard him talk about wanting to die since that week, but you weren’t stupid – you knew that he had risky behaviors; throwing himself in the line of danger whenever given the chance. Every ANBU mission he went on you spent the entire week sick wondering if Minato would have to call you into his office to tell you that there was an accident. 

Those books concerned you; you would have to talk to him again – but not about the smaller issues, no, instead about the biggest issue at hand. And you knew he would try and diminish it – telling you that you had nothing to worry about, and instead of letting him put up a façade you were going to have to push him to talk. 

You could feel your heart racing in your chest.

“I’ll talk to him tomorrow (y/n).” Jiraiya’s large hand rested atop your head; his eyes finding yours with concern. 

“I know – but I also need to talk about him.” You shifted your head down, “He’s told me things that I doubt he would ever dream of telling anyone else.” You could feel the tears threatening to fall. 

“He’ll be okay.” He didn’t even give you time to think before his arms wrapped around yours; his tight grip immediately giving you some comfort. “He still has a long life ahead of him; one full of annoying you with his antics. I’m sure of it.” his lips pressed lightly against the top of your head. “Let’s go get some sleep so we can make sure we talk to him well-rested.” He grabbed your hand, pulling you behind him, “I’m sure he would be mad if he knew you were restlessly worrying about him.”

All you could do was nod and follow in behind him; you knew that Kakashi would be upset with you, but you didn’t care – he didn’t have anyone else left to worry about him.

As the two of laid down, Jiraiya wrapped his arms around you as he got comfortable – you had grown quite accustomed to the feeling of sleeping him, especially on nights when you would lay awake nervous about the various things happening in your life.

Tonight was no different; you laid into his arms wondering if Kakashi was actually going to let you or Jiraiya talk to him or if he was just going to try and brush it off. You drifted off to sleep knowing that regardless of how he reacted, you were going to have to make him listen to you – and if you were lucky, get him to talk to you about more than watching over Kushina.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts??? I just; Minato and Kushina literally make me so happy - they are such a power couple together. 
> 
> And little-baby Kakashi just makes me sad; I just want to give him a big hug.
> 
> Here's the [Discord Link!](https://discord.gg/D6WeKeu) It is a 16+ server - but there's tons of channels and yeah! So feel free to join if you want!


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